That clip up top is the real Three Dirty Dwarves — the actual Sega Saturn game from its publisher. Grab the free RetroPlayers.Club Player and it runs full-speed on your PC, no cartridge required.
The RetroPlayers.Club Player is a Premium perk. Go Premium or sign in to play Three Dirty Dwarves at full speed on your own PC.
Three Dirty Dwarves can be relived on your own PC through the free RetroPlayers.Club Player app — full speed, with a controller and saves just like your hardware. You confirm you own the game from your library, and no need to connect your console.
🎮 USB or Bluetooth controller? Plug it in, Once Detected Click Here to Open Your Controller Options
| Action | Keyboard | Controller |
|---|---|---|
| D-Pad Up | ↑ | D-Pad up |
| D-Pad Down | ↓ | D-Pad down |
| D-Pad Left | ← | D-Pad left |
| D-Pad Right | → | D-Pad right |
| B (bottom) | X | Bottom face |
| A (right) | Z | Right face |
| Y (left) | S | Left face |
| X (top) | A | Top face |
| L | Q | Left shoulder |
| R | E | Right shoulder |
| Start | Enter | Start |
| Select | V | Select |
These are the keys the RetroPlayers.Club Player app uses for Sega Saturn, shown for reference. Your controller still lights up below so you can confirm it is detected — Premium members can remap here (keyboard or USB controller) and the app applies the map at the next launch.
No controller detected yet — plug one in and press any button.
Press buttons — your controller lights up here so you can see it is detected. Go Premium to save a custom map.
| Action | Keyboard | Controller |
|---|---|---|
| Up | W | D-Pad up |
| Down | S | D-Pad down |
| Left | A | D-Pad left |
| Right | D | D-Pad right |
| A | J | Right face |
| B | K | Bottom face |
| C | L | Extra face |
| X | U | Top face |
| Y | I | Left face |
| Z | O | Extra face |
| L | Q | Left shoulder |
| R | E | Right shoulder |
| Start | F | Start |
First registered run claims the top spot. It won't stay easy for long.
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Three Dirty Dwarves is a 1996 beat 'em up video game developed by Appaloosa Interactive and published by Sega for their Sega Saturn console.
How to Play Three Dirty Dwarves
Here is the default control layout for Three Dirty Dwarves in the RetroPlayers.Club Player. Open Controller Mapping in the app to reassign anything to your own keys or gamepad.
The Story Behind Three Dirty Dwarves
They land in a sporting goods store and make use of the equipment inside for their weapons and armor. The children use the distraction to sneak off of the base to freedom. Four children genetically engineered by the army grow up to be child geniuses instead of perfect soldiers, prompting General Briggs to use them to manufacture weaponry.
To escape, the children play their favorite role-playing game and lead the party - a trio of slow-witted but heroic dwarves - to a gateway into the real world. After the dwarves defeat Briggs' subordinate Barney and get past the army bases' automated defenses, Briggs offers them jobs in the army with generous benefits. Even before its release on the Saturn, SegaSoft announced that Three Dirty Dwarves would be the first game they would publish for the PlayStation once they acquired a PlayStation software license.
What You'll Play
Three Dirty Dwarves is a 1996 beat 'em up video game developed by Appaloosa Interactive and published by Sega for their Sega Saturn console. Up to three players take control of the three titular dwarves, with each player controlling one dwarf at a time; if there are fewer than three players, the player(s) can change which dwarf they are controlling at any time. The children use the distraction to sneak off of the base to freedom.
After the dwarves defeat Briggs' subordinate Barney and get past the army bases' automated defenses, Briggs offers them jobs in the army with generous benefits. The dwarves are on the verge of taking the offer, so the children roll the die for their role-playing game until the right number comes up, forcing the dwarves to turn down Briggs' offer and insist on the children's release. Briggs complies, but the dwarves proceed to beat him up anyway.
Why It Still Hits
The four reviewers of Electronic Gaming Monthly especially praised the comic weirdness of the cutscenes and the general fun of the game. Briggs complies, but the dwarves proceed to beat him up anyway. The Sega Saturn version received moderately positive reviews, with most critics praising the game's humor and personality.
Three Dirty Dwarves is a 1996 beat 'em up video game developed by Appaloosa Interactive and published by Sega for their Sega Saturn console. The dwarves are on the verge of taking the offer, so the children roll the die for their role-playing game until the right number comes up, forcing the dwarves to turn down Briggs' offer and insist on the children's release. Major Mike of GamePro said the jumping and three-dimensional gameplay can be awkward, but aspects such as the three-player mode and humor "make this game something special." Rob Allsetter of Sega Saturn Magazine gave Three Dirty Dwarves one of its few negative reviews, calling it "a very irritating and mundane platform game".
Three Dirty Dwarves — Frequently Asked Questions
Who developed Three Dirty Dwarves?
Three Dirty Dwarves was developed by its developer and published by its publisher.
How do I play Three Dirty Dwarves?
Grab the free RetroPlayers.Club Player linked on this page and launch Three Dirty Dwarves in it. It plays the genuine Sega Saturn game natively on your computer; the clip above is a live preview.
What console was Three Dirty Dwarves released on?
Three Dirty Dwarves was released for the Sega Saturn in .
Can I save my progress in Three Dirty Dwarves?
Yes, with Premium: the app lets you save a state at any point in Three Dirty Dwarves and resume from exactly there.
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